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The Abstract Art Of Swearing

Each and every one of us want to be awesome. The more patient and determined guys learn to play some sort of instrument or achieve some sort of hobby in other fields. The less patient and jobless guys write shitty blogs like this or do something just so that they don’t have to see their textbooks for some time. But i feel, that the most lazy and desperate guys try to achive this by copying the “trends” which somehow seep into our daily lives.


Now I don’t have a problem with people trying to achieve some sort of satisfaction by copying others, but what bothers me the most is that half of these “trends” don’t even make sense. Now don’t get me started on those silly “Fashion Trends” that appear on page three of Bangalore Times every day (well, maybe because that’s my favorite article you are insulting. Have I ever mentioned how Glitter Cuticle pumped my swag up by 90 %?) But my profound mojo has been hurt by people doing an even cheaper method and that is- Swearing


Once again I don’t have any problem with people swearing ( I mean come on you *beep*ers, how the *beep* can you be insulted when a *beep*er starts swearing like a *beep*). But my really deep mojo has been dented by the fact that people swear continuously and for no reason at all.


For some mysterious reason, using those amazing four and five lettered words make us feel “cool”. Using swear words have become some sort of magical tokens that are the key to get accepted in society’s different levels. All the swaggy kids use the English ones and all the desi swaggy kids use the ones which belong to their dialect. The amount of swag in your bones is determined by the amount of “beautiful words” popping out of your mouth per minute.


Now before this turns out to be a shitty version of Gandhi’s Experiment with truth, let me tell you that swear words are needed in our language (HA! Hypocrite!) But with a limit.(Make up you mind man!!) The most irritating fact about these curses is that for some inexplicable reason they are often associated with your mother or sister. Two minutes silence for the guy who thought associating your cuss words with females reduces your pain by a significant amount.

                                                              
Using these beautiful words, even if they seem exciting to use, not only spoil the beauty of the language, but also reduce our capability of expressing something in a more dignified manner. It might seem cool among your friends, but slowly and steadily they start appearing in our normal talk. I don’t know how describing your pain in a four lettered expletive can help the people around you in knowing what exactly is wrong. Similarly dropping those clean words every second you speak might make people think that these were the only word you learnt in school.


Maybe its Anurag Kashyap  or maybe its Wolf Of Wall Street, we should realize that actors get paid for saying those dialogues. The only thing that a lazy ass n***a will get in real is less respect. So I would like to end this by saying “Swear wisely, Swear carefully”. And to all those fake swearers and shitty bloggers out there…..

“Go *beep* yourselves”


And May the Phorce Be With You


Adil Ansari



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